Tuesday, June 16, 2009

magic restoration.

lately i have been feeling the need to restore some magic into my life.

i want to pay more attention to the moon and its cycles, the breeze, the clouds.

watching the plants and flowers grow on my balcony is very magical and fulfilling.

we got rid of the tv.

its hard.

it was an addiction, one i looked forward to at the end of the day-and we did not even have cable!- and it hurt a bit to let it go...and yet, i find myself with more time for the more important things- like my kids, house, husband and the gym.

the evening shows i was used to "unwinding" to? pretty much forgotten.

my life is decidedly more magical without the evil box in it.

as i lay on the bed a few minutes ago, nursing my baby and dreamily looking out the window, i felt an eerie sensation of feeling just slightly out of my body.
my fingers and toes had a numb feeling and there was a bright haziness to the sky and clouds. the trees are lush and green and seem to fill my bedroom window, not unlike a tree house.
i made my chunky, roly poly beautiful baby laugh and gurgle and coo and i lay conjuring up my goals, business ideas and next projects.
time kind of slowed.
my mother/wife/woman/friend "self" dissolved and just left me with my higher essence, the essence of my spirit that feels in tune and knows the truth of my life.
it felt distinctly like shedding.
it felt magical.
we may do some traveling soon. i daydream about spain and the beach and sipping sangria in the late evening, wearing espadrilles and white linen.
i am making plans to contact some publishers about some writing ventures and my paintbrushes beckon me, like divining rods, all but quivering in the cup in the closet.
never having experienced weather like this in the summer (cloudy until 5pm and then intensely sunny and muggy, 75 degrees and darkness falling past 10) i come out of my shell and fully into my body no earlier then 3.
swinging on the pendulum of motherhood, i read books and make my three year old giggle, i chop olives and pick thyme from my potted herbs on the balcony and take pilates and read. somehow, i still manage to read an entire book in a day and half.
magic can be mundane, its how we welcome and invite it in that it becomes so.
magic manifests itself everywhere and also it expands through fingertips and laughter.

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